Society & Culture

A Slacker’s Guide: Last Minute Thanksgiving Saves

pummpkin milkshake

You know how in TV Thanksgiving scenes, the boyfriend takes the girlfriend to his family’s dinner and she shows up with her hair perfectly coiffed, likely in Jimmy Choos, and holding a flawlessly made dessert?

Yeah, that’s not going to happen tonight.

The kitchen and I don’t do well together. We’re friendly acquaintances, but we can only stand each other in small doses. In my defense, my mother spends almost her whole life in the kitchen and doesn’t look very happy about it, so this is my minor rebellion.

But my kitchen aversion is not so fun on days like today, when I need to bring dessert over to Thanksgiving dinner. It doesn’t help I’m a major fucking slacker and spent most of the week thinking about what to make instead of actually doing it.

Luckily, there are ladies around the country who understand my perils of being last-minute, and I’m here to share their wisdom with you. You can make these dishes literally the hour before you have to be at dinner, and you can probably do so while holding a mascara wand in one hand.


Pecan Pie Trifle 

Image: Unskinny Boppy

Image: Unskinny Boppy

This brilliance comes from, and it’s absolute genius.

What you need:

1 frozen pecan pie

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

8 ounces of softened marscapone cheese

1 1/2 cups whipping cream

Chocolate fudge ice cream topping

Caramel ice cream topping

 What you have to do:

-Beat together the marscapone, whipping cream and vanilla with a wire whisk until it’s soft.

-Drizzle caramel on the bottom of sundae dish. Use a Ziploc  bag to pipe cream into bottom of dish.

-Use a round biscuit cutter to cut circles from pecan pie, push into middle of dish.

-Pipe more cream on top and drizzle with hot fudge and caramel topping.

If you make the full recipe, you’ll have enough for about 8 individual servings.

Super Quick Pumpkin Bread

Pumpkin Bread Quickie

Image: Lisa Leak

This is in my oven right now. What you need:

3 1/3 cups flour
3 cups sugar
2 teaspoons baking soda
3 tablespoons cinnamon
1 teaspoon nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 jar of pumpkin
4 eggs
1 cups cooking oil
2/3 cup water
1 teaspoon vanilla
What you have to do:
-Mix all dry ingredients in large bowl.
-Mix a well into the dry ingredients. Add all other ingredients into well and stir together until smooth and fully blended.
-Pour into two, greased, 9 x 5 x 3in loaf pans.
-Bake for about 1 hour at 350 degrees or until toothpick comes out clean.
Pumpkin Pie Milkshake
Image: Wonky Wonderful

Image: Wonky Wonderful

This comes from Thank them from the bottom of your hearts.

What you need:

-1 can of pumpkin puree.

-1 cup of milk.

-1 cup of vanilla ice cream.

-3 tablespoons of brown sugar.

-1/2 teeaspoon of pumpkin pie spice.

What you have to do:

-Blend all ingredients.

-Top milkshakes with whipped cream. Add sprinkles of pumpkin pie spice.

Makes 4½ cups.

There. You’re done. Thanksgiving: Over. Now go do something fun.


Julyssa Lopez’s first loves are long books and long pieces of writing, but she also can’t resist dreamy ambient music, tiny art galleries, or ice cold lemonade. She comes from a loud Nicaraguan family and constantly has that dream where your teeth fall out.

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